its overrated,

you cry when ur happy, you cry when your upset, I mean when isn’t there a time in life that everyone at least one cry? It may be as happy as watching your newborn being born or when your at a funeral. sure there are many many reasons to cry but they all start in one place, The heart. The heart can be a wonderful place, it can be a terrible place, it can be warm and lovely and at the same time it can be harsh and cold. Many people may say you have to choose what you are like. whether your warm or cold. they really are all related in what I would like to call a cycle. everyone has the chance to be loving and at the same time they can turn around and be just as harsh. It all really depends on what you want to make people think of you. Sometimes the heart weeps at the wrong decision chosen. It feels like a crooked dagger has been shoved down deep inside and is permanently in pain.

Some think that love is just an emotion that you have that is the opposite of hatred. To me love and hatred can be two completely similar emotions right next to each other. Some have told me that they are too cold to cry. but deep inside you know that there was a time that you cried. isn’t there at least one time? for me I over cry but it helps me destress. then I come out and start writing these. It helps me relax. even if its something that other people read and just say so what? get over it!

To your face I will cry, I will smile, I will even laugh, but never do I like to show my face because I am embarrassed. im afraid that if I show you even the most normal of human emotions well your going to disown me, throw me to the side like some stupid piece of garbage. Even hoping for this to not be true I try. I tried love it failed twice now, im working on my third and I hope that its my last, nothing can make me happier. Except to have the family on my side more then just mom and him and a friend. its really discouraging, I should be told to do stuff that I know will make me happy and what I feel is right for me, I should not have to be told or begged to stay at this point in life, I really want to move on and out into the wide world.

I really do not know where to start. 😦

Is there anything in here that someone can help me figure out where I can get a fresh start?